Extracting Wisdom

Dec 02, 2006

Extracting a wisdom tooth has left me wizened. When I visited the dentist with a hurting tooth, which was just about showing up, he vociferously convinced me that it was a wise decision to pull it out. Thinking defiance would be a vice; likewise I prepared to go through the ordeal. It was an impacted tooth. And letting it grow in unruly directions would be an unwise decision. So the wizard like surgeon began his job.

In a whiz the monstrous equipments were readied – a mini electric saw to cut the bones and teeth; anesthetic injections so the pain is felt everywhere else; needles and threads to patch it up and some other miscellaneous hideous things.

Then came the first painful prick. The syringe looked so much like a miniature missile about to be launched. The left side of my mouth was suitably sedated and I could not feel it anymore. Then the surgeon sharpened his axe or maybe electric saw and I could not bear to keep my eyes open any longer. I reckon the tooth cutter would have looked like a canon and the needle to sew like swords albeit miniscule.


The chloroform had nicely seeped in to my cheek and jaw. The surgeon decided to make use of his carpentry skills. So he cut the top part of the tooth that was showing up just a bit. And then he sawed the bone to enable him to tow out the remaining part, most of which was underground. He sawed and sawed. For a moment I thought my skull was one of those alphabet cubes in the boggle game that is put in a box and nicely jostled. Then the side that is anesthetized is almost asleep. So the pain is felt everywhere else in my skull. Once I even thought he was cutting the upper tooth by mistake. I actually signaled to the surgeon to find out if he had heard me right when I said left lower tooth. But I slumped back in resignation determined to sue him a few millions if he had extracted wrong wisdom out of me.

After a cool 40 minutes of drilling the surgeon pulled out the tooth ala an obstinate screw being pulled out of a wall. Then he put his tailoring skill set into use. Out came the needle and thread and the rudimentary remains of my left jaw were sutured.

And as a coup de grace the thoughtful surgeon asked me – Any doubt? And I was obviously dumb founded. First my speech is incapacitated with the entire cutting, extracting and stitching. Then I found I could not even use my dumb charading skills because I had received a shot on my arm and had a piece of cotton stuck on my elbow. And then am not even ambidextrous to write it down with my left hand.By far one question I did not have answers or questions rather. I wondered dolefully if donning multiple roles could make surgeons oblivious to present inabilities. So I helplessly shook my head in negation and walked out of the torture chamber.

At home I sat nursing the now chubbier side of my face with an ice pack. And even chocolate ice cream cannot make you smile enough to endure the anesthesia wearing off. The next one-week was spent in abeyance. No spicy food / no hot food / no hard food. I wanted to trash the saccharine feeling in my mouth that the juices and milk shakes were giving. So I promised myself a fire spitting Andhra meal after the one week was over with. However there were some petty perks like being a bit pampered and excused of errands.

Confinement has its strange ways of thought provocation. Great books and theories were written in prison. When I was under House Arrest I had nothing to do but think and blink. Why are we as a generation losing wisdom left and right? It has become a standard medical expense to be claimed at office. After whipping my little grey cells to work I realized it had to be – Evolution. And instantly knew it was not my fault. Our fathers and forefathers did not use their wisdom to the extent they should have. So as per the Use and Disuse theory of Lamarck – that which is not used will degenerate it self or evolve itself into non-existence. Nature is curtailing something that we don’t have much use for. So if we are getting dumber as a generation we instinctively know whom to blame.