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Friday, August 31, 2007

Wonders and Blunders of Cellular Phones

It’s in your house and in your pocket
In future maybe even in your locket
A tring tring here and a tring tring there
It’s almost a body part like your nail or hair

Cellular phones have become such a necessary evil today that I often wonder what the world would do without them. Here are some wonders and blunders this marvel can do for you.

Wonders

- I realized the immense potential of this wondrous gadget while bunking classes in college. Missing specific classes can be quite tricky. Bumping into the teacher who has just finished class can be worse than attending the class itself. Hence it becomes very handy when back benchers can give regular teacher ‘coming and going’ reports.

- Finger massages without text messages would be impossible. Now developing typing speed is passé. Sms speed is the need of the hour. Personal Computers on mobile phone are not a far cry. Soon you could have a whole new industry called – SMS schools that will replace the older times’ typing schools that will help in fine tuning your sms typing speed.

- The 'Humour industry' has taken a quantum leap thanks to the click happy generation. It has affected the world so much that I cannot imagine what the world would have done without smses. Millions of jokes, funny one liners are exchanged every day. If the HQ (Humour Quotient) or the Average World Humour level has increased it has a lot to do with text messages.

- New language skills have been developed thanks to the sms world. It is said new languages help us to develop our logical brain. Text messages have developed a unique genre of their own. New and shorter words, more expressive emoticons etc have taken birth. It looks deceptively similar to English but is trying to soon emerge as a language of its own. Even though it has originally taken off from English it is actually another stand alone invention of the 21st century and will soon be patented.

- Missed calls have changed the way we communicate. So in those difficult months when you exhaust your free smses; missed calls can be so handy. For eg. 3 missed calls means I am coming. 4 missed calls means I am late. Also when a man conjures courage to propose his love and is on those last few precarious free smses, giving missed calls as an answer may be worth it. One for yes and two for no.

- Cell phones help us take some tough decisions. During those grueling indecisive moments when you shop, picking up the wrong pick can be disastrous. Discount sales and bargains last for such short periods, it could often be a precarious touch and go situation. However, when you take a quick picture and send it to your fashion consultant who can quickly do the trick. Decisions are taken in a jiffy. A picture can speak a thousand words. So imagine the amount of talk time that is saved.
- This device has given such a boost to the espionage profession. Cool detectives take pictures glibly during under cover operations. The profession has received such a shot in the arm. Though very often one has to be careful not to fall victim to a wannabe spy or psychopath.

- This industry is definitely causing waves. Though the waves are radio active in nature.

Blunders

- RSS: Repetitive Sms Syndrome. The younger the user the more the text messages that are sent. Soon people will be queuing in at physiotherapy sessions to get rid of the pain that they will experience in the corner of their lower palm right below the thumb.

- The cellular phone industry is surely giving the pharmaceutical world a run for its money. The reason may be ludicrously indirect but worth a thought. Like we said that there is no disputing how the jokes that go around in smses have contributed to the average world humour level to go up. Also it is a well known fact that laughter is the best medicine. So it’s putting two and two together now.

- In the glorious days of movies trying to reek of innocence, pigeons used to often play such an important role of bonding. The swollen eyed heroine would kiss the pigeon and hand over her missive to be flown miles away. So you see pigeon actors have lost their livelihoods. The poor little birds do not even have an organized labour union to fight their cause. The mobile phone is such a pseudo substitute.

- The cell phone can be such a hideous blackmailing device. The days of iffy mood swings and poking elbows with siblings and roommates for no justifiable reason can get you trapped. Words that are uttered here caustic and can cause violent reactions – both chemical and physical. And imagine if it is recorded surreptitiously and be held against you for ransom.

- Human best friends have serious competition. For many people cell phones are their faithful companions. It is ‘all weather’ and ‘all location’ friend. It does not tag along with anyone, but is more like something that one would not want to leave. So in these days of distance difficulties human best friends are often replaced by these little inanimate box-like structures. It plays on one’s mind so much that the number pad often looks a sympathetic smile.

Wonders or Blunders – Cell phones have changed our lives and how.